ENGLISH NOACH
THE DECISIONS WE MAKE
About five years ago, sitting in the park near my house in Bayit Vegan watching my kids, I noticed that the fellow sitting on the bench next to me was speaking to his kid in English. This is uncommon in Bayit Vegan. The majority of younger families here are either French or Spanish speaking. So, I started conversation. It turns out that this fellow is a NLP teacher (Neuro-Linguistic-Programming). I asked him what that stuff was; at the time I knew nothing about it.
He said to me, “Imagine that you see a poor, poor man, homeless, going down the street. He sees the things that we all see. But what is going through his mind? What decisions is he making?” I told him that he is looking around, looking at the nice apartments. That he does not have. That he thinks everyone who made money either stole it, or maybe he thinks that G-d hates him, and loves everyone else.
This fellow in the park answered me that this is far from the truth. This is not what is going through the mind of the poor person. This is you, in your mind, from your eyes, imagining to yourself what is going on with the poor guy. But a real, poor, homeless person, when he sees a garbage bin – he sees tonight’s supper. When he sees a park bench, in the corner where he won’t be woken up in the morning by kids on the way to school, he has found
his bed for the night. He is not looking at the apartments. He is not looking at the rich and famous.
From this introduction, I would like to springboard to an understanding of something hidden between the lines in this week’s parasha. Imagine for a minute that you were Noach. You are 600 years old. Don’t laugh hard, you might pass out from loss of oxygen at that age. You are asked by G-d to build anArk.Not just to “tell” the people of the world that their end is coming near and that G-d is finished with them. You are expected by G-d to build an ark, a big “thing” in middle of town, just to remind people every day, all day, that G-d hates the way that they live and they are expected to change, “or else”. The whole world is against you. You were asked by G-d to gather all the animals, a lot of Kosher ones and not as much non Kosher ones. And then you go into theArk.With your close family and kids. You don’t sleep for forty days and forty nights, running a “five- star service” cruise for all the species. You don’t see the light of day, and the only light you have is the strong light of this special stone that Noach hung from the ceiling. You deal with the garbage and foul smells that have accumulated. No fresh air. And your leg is bleeding severely from the lion that ripped it open when you were a little late in bringing him his food.
And then things calm down. You are grateful to G-d for keeping you and your loved ones alive. But you probably want “out”. You know that there is dry land because of the dove and the olive twig. There is no sign of G-d. And then there is a bump. You have landed, and things dry up. What is going through your mind?
The Midrash says (ילקו”ש בראשית פ’ ח’ סי’ נט’) , “What would go through the minds of almost everyone? R’ Yudan said, Had I been there, I would have broken down the door and gone out.” The Tanchuma Yashan adds that this is precisely what his children told him. But Noach said,” Just as I came in with permission by G-d, I must leave with permission by G-d.” Noach did not follow his natural impulse. He did not just run out, get started with life. He made a deduction. He thought about each thing, what he should do and how he should behave.
The Midrash tells us ויבן נח מזבח לה’ ויקח . Noach build an alter, brought sacrifices, the first thing after he left the ark. Why did Noach do that? The Midrash tells us that the word ויבן does not only mean built. It means understood. Noach understood that if G-d put in theArk more kosher animals than non kosher animals, this was for Noach to understand that he was to bring a sacrifice after things would calm down.
How did Noach understand this? Because he looked around and figured things out, asking himself questions like, “What does G-d want me to do?” This is without Noach having received prophesy to do so.
When we are faced with a decision in life, we must ask ourselves, , for whatever reason I find myself here in life – here I am. So, what does G-d want from me this year, this week , this minute?. What is it that He gave me, and what does He expect me to do with it? This is what Binah is. This is what Noach had. And this is a message we should take with us from the Teiva.
A MESSAGE FROM A DOVE
At the end of forty days of rain, Noah sent a raven and afterwards a dove to verify that the floodwater had subsided. The dove returned to Noah with an olive tree branch in its beak. The Talmud (Eiruvin 18b) explains that the dove here relayed to Noach the following message. “I would prefer my food and sustenance bitter as an olive from the hands of G-d to food as sweet as honey from the hands of a human being.” The dove’s words were powerful, maybe even slighting to Noach, who had toiled restlessly for forty days to sustain this dove among all the animals of the world. The following concept may clarify this:
The “dove with a twig in its beak” became an international symbol of peace. R’ S. R. Hirsh claims, however, that the dove does not represent peace as much as it represents independence. The dove conveyed to Noah that independence offers greater pleasure than comfort. Although the dove received first class service, this did not in any way equal the pleasure of freedom and dealing with the world as is, without assistance. We may not be cognizant of it, but G-d implanted in all creatures an innate pleasure in life of managing on their own, without human intervention for support. This pleasure is linked to the world’s greatest pleasure, recognition of G-d and acknowledging His hand in our success. This pleasure is greater and deeper than being supported comfortably. When one is being supported, he can be easily misled into believing that the means of support are the source and not merely a medium.
Hence, the dove told Noah the following. I have enjoyed all that you have done for me and I am grateful. Despite this, I would like to move on and have a direct relationship with my Creator. This reminds us of the prayer we make in Birkat Hamazon, the grace after meals. And please, Almighty, do not make us dependent upon the hands of humans for sustenance… rather dependent on Your hand, which is so generous, open, full and rich…
Whether we are supported by others or on our own, we must remember not to lose focus of Who ultimately supports us. Displaying appreciation to G-d and strengthening our relationship with Him can bring about the ultimate inner satisfaction. All this can be handicapped by a false perspective that a parent, guardian, school administration, boss etc. is the root source from which we receive our sustenance. The dove conveyed to us a message that it is easy to be confused about this. Although these kind sources of support toil endlessly to benefit their recipients, we must keep in mind that the real source of sustenance is from Above. This concept can aid those who are bitter about how much and exactly how they are supported. A sincere Birkat Hamazon and a change of perspective may convert such bitterness into something as sweet as honey.
INTERNATIONAL MARRIAGES – COMMON GOALS
I have always found international couples interesting. Both my parents and I are such international marriages. The international couples that are most amusing to me are those in which the two did not share a common language at the outset. In some way, they felt that they were “meant to be”. More often than not, they live happily ever after. Unfortunately, many times this lasts until they figure out a common language. Somehow, this complicates the tranquility in their relationship. Both begin to doubt if they were really “meant to be”. I wondered at this phenomenon for more than a while. Somehow, I stumbled on the following idea which is highly related to this type of marriage in particular and to all marriages in general.
At the conclusion of our parasha, the people of the world unified for the purpose of creating theTowerofBabylon. The mass of builders shared the same goal with three different plans (Sanhedrin 109a). One group intended to climb to the sky in order to live amongst the angels. The second group desired to climb to the sky in order to serve foreign gods. The third wanted to reach the sky with the intent to fight G-d and prevent Him from bringing another flood. And G-d punished them in three different ways. The first group were scattered by G-d. The second group became monkeys, ghosts, and demons. As for the third group, G-d sent down angels to mix up their languages. Although there were different groups and each deserved his own punishment, they all shared the common goal of erecting this sort of skyscraper.
On the verse that mentions the confusion of languages for group three, Rashi comments that G-d did not merely make a barrier of total non-comprehension. Rather, G-d confused the mass in such a way that this one asked for a brick, and his worker brought cement, instead. Frustrated over the mistake of his counterpart, the first one takes a spike and crushes his friend’s skull. When one asked for “X” in one language, this meant “Z” in the language of his acquaintance. Why did G-d not suffice with dispersing the masses with a confusion where there would exist a complete non-comprehension?
The Brisker Rav answers with the following life principle. When two people share a common goal in anything in life, the chances they will succeed are not just 1 x 2; rather, it is in an entirely different league. And the more people there are sharing a common goal, the less likely that there will be failure . They minimize the possibility of failure, making it almost unrealistic. There was great unity between the builders: they shared the goal of erecting such a tower, which gave the construction project tremendous power. This unified project was to overcome all obstacles, including not understanding each other’s tongue. The only way G-d felt it suitable to disperse them was a change of language which resulted in “one takes a spike and crushes his friends skull”. If there had been total non-comprehension, they would still have been on the same page, with a sense of unity through common goals, and then nothing would have been able to disperse them, despite their not having been able to communicate. G-d felt it necessary first to confound their ability to communicate, which resulted in their frustration, nullifying all the power that unity can generate and making it impossible to work as a team.
We may be able to apply this to marriage as well. Once there is miscommunication, where one thinks he understood the other and frustrates his/her spouse by behaving in a different manner than would normally be expected, this can be even worse than not understanding the language to begin with. When these mistakes happen, it may be a good idea to discuss and focus on the original goal with which they started their relationship. This may help with dealing with frustrations of miscommunication.
