FRAME IT!
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FRAME IT!
Parashat Lech Lecha
I will never forget how, when my late great-grandfather Will reached his 100th birthday, he received a happy birthday letter from President Clinton. He framed it. The card wasn’t so important, but the person who gave the card was important. The president of the United States of America is like… the boss of all bosses.
I was worried by Biden’s comment that he would end the Moslem ban on day one and have Moslem voices as part of his administration. My Rabbi said, “Don’t worry – לֶב־מֶ֖לֶךְ בְּיַד־יְקוָ֑ק עַֽל־כָּל־אֲשֶׁ֖ר יַחְפֹּ֣ץ יַטֶּֽנּוּ A king’s heart is … in YKVK’s hand; He does with it as He wishes. (Mishlei 21;1) The higher position a person has, the more he is bossed by G-d. Because G-d is the Boss of the boss of all bosses.
Imagine that each time you say “Baruch Hashem”, you are framing that kindness from G-d that says that the Boss of all bosses LOVES YOU!!! I am so lucky that the Boss of all bosses has always taken care of me. He gave me a loving Mommy and Abba, who went through sleepless nights to change and burp me, when I was too small to change or burp myself. He clothed me, fed me, sheltered me, brought the sun for me each morning and lit my nights with the moon, sent me the most beautiful and unique people I have in my life. FRAME IT ALL WITH A “G-D LOVES YOU” FRAME!
People do so many things to prove that they are important, even if it is just to prove their significance to themselves. In Judaism, the very fact that you exist proves that you are important to G-d! There is no greater self-validation, no more significant way for you to believe that you have value than recognizing the Boss’ love for you.
From the time we begin growing up, we naturally think otherwise. We think in accordance with our fabricated story – that my life is independent of G-d. That I am either at the mercy of other people, or I control other people. That other people manipulate me, or I manipulate them. Unless you begin to contemplate, to think more in-depth.
G-d first tested Avraham with לֶךְ־לְךָ֛ מֵאַרְצְךָ֥ וּמִמּֽוֹלַדְתְּךָ֖ וּמִבֵּ֣ית אָבִ֑יךָ אֶל־הָאָ֖רֶץ אֲשֶׁ֥ר אַרְאֶֽךָּ Go to you from your land, and from your birthplace, and from your father’s house to the land that I will show you. This passuk seems strange. If you leave your land, you have already left your birthplace. If you left your birthplace, you have already left your father’s home! And a second question. Didn’t we learn at the end of Parashat Noach that Avraham had already left Ur Kasdim with his father and family, to go towards the Land of Canaan? Weren’t they already in Haran?
The Malbim answers that the test that G-d gave Avraham, and is giving every one of us each day, is to leave our past behind, to live in the Now. You are not your childhood.בית אביך You are not your community. מולדתך You are not your culture. ארצך As you grow up, you form a mental image of who you are, based on your personal and cultural conditioning. We tend to derive a sense of self from our mind’s content and activity, and we become addicted to our thinking. We identify with the thoughts we have from childhood.
The first Mitzvah is to go out of how we thought in our parents’ home, how we naturally thought because of our community or our country. How so? You grow up thinking that your parents are boss. The king or queen of the class is boss. The boss at work is boss. The president of the United States is boss. Go more inward, לך לך, and you will be able to detach yourself from those people, places or things. To disconnect your story from so many different bosses.
Humans are reactors. We react to surroundings we experience and think/feel/believe accordingly. We react to the ‘nouns’, the persons, places, or things around us. We think like the music we hear, like the views we see, like the food we eat. The background has more impact on our subconscious than we realize. We identify with childhood thought patterns even up to our 100th birthday!
Naturally, a person grows up thinking, that the way he/ she thinks is reality, normal, and we identify our identity with those subjective realities. G-d tested Avraham, and He challenges each of us to rise above the patterns of thinking acquired in our father’s household, our community, our culture, and to adopt the way G-d shows us. Go to the Land I will show you, or the world, the way it really is, the world that I am the Master Orchestrator of. To the land of Kanaan, the land of humility, כנען from the root כנע. How does one achieve this?
There is a word that we say, about a hundred and one times a day, that Avraham Avinu invented. The word is Ado-nai. “R Shimon Ben Yochai said that from the day the HKBH created His world, there was no one who called HKBH Adon, until Avraham came and called Him Adon.” Avraham used the word Ado-nai, when asking G-d for a son. (15;2) When asking for a guarantee that his descendants inherit the Land of Canaan. (15;8) When asking G-d to excuse him, so that he could invite the Arab guests in the scorching heat. (18;3) And when he prayed for the people of Sodom, Avraham used the name Ado-nai four times. (18;27 , 18;30 , 18;31, 18;32)
The Noda Beyehuda explains. Until Abraham, people believed that it was not befitting for the world’s Creator to run this lowly world Himself. People believed that G-d deals only with upper worlds, zodiacs, and the like. Avraham called out in the name of G-d, publicizing the belief that G-d is “Adon Olam.” G-d runs everything in your life and is the Adon, the Boss, of all your bosses.
Each morning, we remind ourselves this when we say in Elokay Neshama, רבון כל המעשים אדון כל הנשמות. Master of all actions, Boss of all the souls. Ever notice that there are two times we refer to G-d in our daily prayers, אלקי! My G-d! at the beginning of a prayer? Before we make the blessing that G-d returns my Neshama to me each morning, and at the end of Amidah, before we ask G-d to prevent my mouth from speaking slander, my heart from arrogance. Why do we mention My G-d! before saying נשמה שנתת בי טהורה the soul that you put in me is pure? Why do we mention My G-d! before asking נצור לשוני מרע, prevent my tongue from speaking slander? And another question: isn’t it in my power, not to speak slander, or not to have haughtiness? Why are we asking this from G-d, anyway?
The word אלקי is short for אלוקים שלי—the ם של drops in accordance with Dikduk. Elokim is the Name of G-d that represents His authority over nature. Both Elokim and Teva (nature) have a numerical value of 81. We ask G-d to make it natural for us to speak without slander and have a humble heart! G-d, allow me to surrender my free choice to You! When we praise G-d for the soul that He gives us, the Neshama, we mention that He is in charge of my nature. Why? Because the word Neshama is from the root of Neshima. There are two things I have no control over in my body: my breathing and my thoughts. If I decide not to breathe, I will faint, wake up again and breathe again, because G-d is doing constant CPR and breathing into me. ויפח באפיו נשמת חיים And, if I decide not to think tomorrow, the first thing when I wake up, I think, Today, I am not thinking, and I already had my first thought. Thinking is also from the Neshama. I can’t have an endless breath. And I can’t have an endless thought. (Likutei Maharil Emor) When we thank G-d for our Neshama each morning, we confirm that He is Boss of my nature. He is אלוקי! Without Him, I don’t exist! I am a lifeless body, without a thinking self! Without my Neshama, I am just like an empty container, “the soul that you put in me” בי and not “the soul that you gave to me” לי. As the blessing ends, “…the One who returns souls to lifeless bodies”.
My wife’s grandmother “Nona”, from Beirut, holds my babies on her lap and sings in French, Ein Si Fo, Fo, Fo, Le Pettito Marrioneto. Which means, move your hands, my little puppet. From the minute we were born, we have just been moving our hands, like puppets.
Selfie Steps to rise above addictive thinking and let go of the past:
- Sometimes we think holding on makes us strong, but sometimes letting go is being even stronger. Sooner or later, we’ve all got to let go of our past. You have to know when it’s time to turn the page.
- Sometimes G-d wants us to let go of the life we’ve planned, so we can be ready to have the life that He has waiting for us.
- Letting go of the past needs to be a conscious decision. It is not enough to merely know that it the past is irrelevant.
- Letting go of the past does not mean giving up. There is a fine line between letting go and giving up, although the ramifications are worlds apart.
- Holding on is believing that there is only a past; letting go is knowing that there’s a future.
Refuah Shelema Avraham Ben Mazal
Refua shelema of Moshe ben Alice ,
Haim Raphael ben Simha and
Salhah bat Rahel
Among the sick of Israel.
